Hi sh4m3sh4m3,
I agree with the other posters. Give yourself time. Something which I came to realise is that even though the WTS is good at pervading your life through emotional control, they cannot ever take who you are away from you as long as you choose not to let them do so. It may not feel like that right now. Time will help. The important thing is not to be rushed by anybody. Respect yourself and choose to do things in your own time.
Do you have the support of your husband?
You mention that you're not sure what is the right thing to do. Can I ask what research you have done into the bible? You mention the UN fiasco, but I was wondering how much time you've spent comparing what the WTS teaches to what the bible was actually written for. If this is something you haven't done yet, I recommend it. I spent months doing it and the basis for the WTS teachings was completely blown away.
Can I recommend a book, which isn't actually too long, for you to read if you think the above would be useful?
How to Read the Bible: History, Prophecy, Literature - Why Modern Readers Need to Know the Difference, and What It Means for Faith Today
Synopsis
More people read the Bible than any other book. Indeed, many try to live their lives according to its words. The question is, do they understand what they're reading? As Steven McKenzie shows in this provocative book, quite often the answer is, "No." McKenzie argues that to comprehend the Bible we must grasp the intentions of the biblical authors themselves--what sort of texts they thought they were writing and how they would have been understood by their intended audience. In short, we must recognize the genres to which these texts belong. McKenzie examines several genres that are typically misunderstood, offering careful readings of specific texts to show how the confusion arises, and how knowing the genre produces a correct reading. The book of Jonah, for example, offers many clues that it is meant as a humorous satire, not a straight-faced historical account of a man who was swallowed by a fish. Likewise, McKenzie explains that the very names "Adam" and "Eve" tell us that these are not historical characters, but figures who symbolize human origins ("Adam" means man, "Eve" is related to the word for life).Similarly, the authors of apocalyptic texts--including the Book of Revelation--were writing allegories of events that were happening in their own time.
Not for a moment could they imagine that centuries afterwards, readers would be poring over their works for clues to the date of the Second Coming of Christ, or when and how the world would end. For anyone who takes reading the Bible seriously and who wants to get it right, this book will be both heartening and enlightening.
The book shows how genuine Christainity is nothing like fundamentalist Christianity, or the apocalyptic-cult style of religion (e.g. do what we say or you will die a terrible death not very long from now).
Keep being true to yourself, and you'll get there.